Exiled!

Introduction:  One of the first stories told in the Bible is the story of the expulsion of Adam and Eve from paradise. Their story is our story because it records how humanity has sought to return to a personal relationship with God after they've fallen from grace. This drama of exile continues throughout the Old Testament until a dramatic event. That event was that God became one of us in the person of Jesus Christ! Through Christ, we are no longer exiles but children of God. As God's children, we have the gift of eternal life. This gift is our inheritance, given to us by Christ who died for our sins and more importantly rose from the dead, defeating death once and for all. Consequently, we are free to live our lives without fear or doubt. This is the Good News of the Bible! Yet, there are those among us who have not heard the Good News or who deny its existence. The result is they, like

Adam and Eve, are still living in exile. Like the prodigal son, they search for joy in their lives but seek to find it in the wrong places.

Exile:  So, what does it mean to live in exile?  Have you ever experienced exile in your life? Are you looking for that elusive state of joy in your life?  In search of an answer, where do we begin?

Whether we recognize it or not, we have all lived in exile to one degree or another. If you have been pushed out, kicked out, discriminated against because of the color of your skin or what you believed, you have been exiled. Just look at what is taking place in our culture today with the corona virus.  If you're sick, you must be quarantined or isolated. If you're over 65-years old in California you're exiled in your own homes. You don't have the freedom to go to a restaurant or to go to work. This pandemic has made us all exiles in our own land! 

Even before this virus struck, many people were forced into an exile existence. Talk to the woman who has just been divorced, and she will share her feelings of being exiled. She takes on a new status and she feels like people look at her differently. What about the alcoholic who has struggled with his illness and as a result has been shut out of his family?  Is he living in exile?  Then there is the solider who has just come back from a war zone deployment, does he or she live in an exile state? Speaking from experience, combat vets find it difficult to reintegrate back into society.

I can remember coming back from Vietnam in 1966; it was one of the most difficult transitions I had to face. In returning home, I felt like a stranger in my own land. When you return home, you are bringing all of your emotional baggage with you. You can leave Vietnam, but Vietnam never leaves you. Allow me to explain further. As a security policeman assigned to a K-9 unit, each night we had to go out and patrol the outer perimeter of the base with our dogs. We walked the night alone. We were the first line of defense. During my tour of duty, I had my share of encounters that affected the way I thought, acted and felt. To this day, I am still dealing with nightmares.  I can't tell you how many times I have been shot in the chest in my dreams in a combat situation. I am still haunted by the two airmen I almost shot as they tried to climb over a perimeter fence in the middle of the night to get back onto base as they stood in a kill zone. Then, there was the time I slept through a firefight just below my post. My worst night came when I encountered a VC probe and I opened fire! 

When I was called home on emergency leave due to a family tragedy, I tried to engage with old high school friends, but I had changed. I could not engage with them because their life experience was no longer mine. When I left Vietnam to return home, I left my innocence behind. I was a different person and as a result, I entered into a self-imposed exile. My exile would last for years, buried deep within my soul. I was living in exile, and I didn't even recognize my condition. That is until I began seeking medical treatment at the VA Hospital.

Every time I went in for an appointment, the hospital staff kept asking me if I have PTSD?  My answer was a quick no! I did not want the stigma of such a medical tag. However, over time I kept looking back and upon a deep examination of my life, the nightmares, feeling cautious around strangers, flashbacks, and having the need to have two guns in my nightstand, it was time to face my demons.  I had to break through my denial and face the facts. I needed to find the answers to the questions I had not raised.  I accepted the reality that if I was going to accept my past, I needed to look into the future. I began the journey of self-discovery and started to see a VA counselor. 

What I found to be true regarding my life's experiences was true regarding my spiritual experience as well. Like Adam and Eve, I had to accept the reality that I was living in exile with one foot in the doorway.  It wasn't that I was a bad person; however, I had to admit that even though I was religious and went to church on occasion, I was not deeply committed to my faith. My faith was like an insurance policy, you kept it available just in case you needed it in an emergency. If I was going to break out of my exile and denial, I had to reevaluate my relationship with Jesus Christ.  

During this time of crisis, we have a blessed opportunity to reflect on our lives.  This virus has forced us to re-examine our piorites.  Perhaps, we can look at the many things we took for granted, like going to a resturant, having coffee with a friend at Starbucks, or hiking in the mountains. Most importantly, in our moments of isolation, we are beginning to realize that we need each other.  The doors of opportunity are waiting to be opened if we are willing to break through our denial and accept that we were once exiles in our own land.  And, in this Holy Week, we can celebrate or rediscover that we are free at last!  

"The Elusive Gift of Joy" by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

The Elusive Gift of Joy

One of my favorite parables, as told by Jesus in Luke's gospel, is the story of the prodigal son. In the 15th chapter of that gospel, Jesus is teaching a number of lessons on the subject of what it means to be lost.  In telling the stories, he uses images to which audience can easily relate. So, he tells them about lost sheep, a lost coin, and finally a story about a lost son. In each of the stories, Jesus seeks to convey the extent to which we search for that which is lost and the joy we experience upon its recovery.

The story of the prodigal son is my story. When I read it, I am reminded of the many times I became lost! Like the young man, I have done some foolish things. Like him, I made some unwise decisions.  Like him, I went down the wrong path and separated myself from family, church, and my support systems. Like him, I have been distracted by wild living. And just like him, I had to find my way back home.  But, let us go back to the beginning of the story because there may be some facts about this young lad that may have eluded you.

The prodigal is the second son in this family.  Growing up behind an older brother, who was responsible and mature, was a challenge. In fact, he found it difficult to compete with his older brother. His brother did everything well, and why not?  As the oldest, he had only adults as examples. Consequently, the older brother got all the accolades and positive reinforcement. Even more than that, being the first born son, his family embraced him with great affection. Since the prodigal could not compete with his older brother, what did he do?  He sought negative attention and became the bad boy of the family. How do we know this fact?  Just look at his actions.  At the first opportunity, the prodigal son abandoned his family and relocated in a far off land! More than that, he sought a lifestyle that was corrupt and wild! He followed his heart's desire, that was until the money ran out.  Once he was broke and friendless, it was only then that he came to his senses. As he pondered his situation, he began to think about the elusive gift of joy.

With his inheritance in hand, he thought he could buy his happiness. He threw off the shackles of responsibility, which freed him to live the life he wanted for himself.  Or at least so he thought.  So he indulged in the party life, without a care in the world, nor thinking of the consequences of his actions.  As long as he had the money to buy his happiness, he lived in his delusion. And his delusion was that he was living the joyful life.

Now, ponder this story for a minute, look around you. How many times do you see the drama played out in your life with family and friends?  How many people do you know who seek to find their joy smoking a joint or downing a six pack of beer? What about those who seek to feed their sexual appetites with multiple relationships at the same time?  Are they seeking the elusive gift of joy?  Is enough ever enough to fill them with that joy? So, what is the answer?  What did this young man have to do to change course?

One of the conditions that affects the human spirit and forces us into poor choices is the issue of denial. Denial does not allow us to seek that which is truth. Denial blinds us from the facts. Denial fills our minds with fear of what may be taking places at the moment and forces us to accept other answers or other solutions. We all do it! The big question is, can we break free of denial's grasp on our lives? In the case of the prodigal son, he had to be honest with himself. He needed to look deep within himself and search his soul to rediscover what brought joy in his life.

Once this young man broke through his denial, the elusive gift of joy was right in front of him.  He needed to go back home and return to his father's love and embrace. The reality is that home offers us more than a place to rest our heads. Home is a sacred place where we learn about holy values such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Gal. 5:22)  When we grasp these fruits of God's Spirit, is this not how we really want to live our lives?

"Toxic Sibling Rivalries" by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

Toxic Sibling Rivalries 

In the 4th chapter in the book of Genesis, we are introduced to the tragic story of two brothers.  The firstborn son was Cain and the second was named Abel. Their parents were Adam and Eve. Cain, the older, was a tiller of the soil, while his brother tended to the flocks. When it came time to make their offering to God, Cain offered up the first fruits of his crop, while Abel offered the fat portion of his animal sacrifice. When the gifts were received by God, He appreciated the animal sacrifice of Abel's above the crop offering of Cain's. In response, Cain grew in anger at his brother, the result leading Cain to seek revenge. So, Cain killed his younger brother. This story is the first recorded episode of human violence and toxic sibling rivalry. When God confronted Cain and inquired about Abel, Cain responded, "Am I my brother's keeper?" This story is the first recorded drama of human violence,  but it would not, however, be the last.

As we continue reading in Genesis, we come across the story of Jacob and Esau, the sons of Isaac. Now, in those days it was a custom to give your blessing to your first-born son. This blessing was a critical gift for the well-being of your first male child. In this case, it would have been Esau. The boys' mother, however, favored the younger brother Jacob, and she conspired with Jacob to steal his older brother's blessing. Consequently, when Esau was out hunting for the family, the younger son snuck into his father's tent posing to be the older son. Since his father had failing eye sight, he could not tell one son from the other. As a result, Jacob tricked his father and received the blessing meant for his brother! And, with this blessing, Jacob would have nations honoring and kneeling before him. When Esau discovered he was robbed of his father's blessing, the boy wept. Esau was angry, and Jacob had to flee from his brother's wrath. Yet, in doing so, Jacob discovered his destiny with history.  This saga of toxic, sibling rivalry continues on from biblical times to the present day. If you look, it is everywhere, if not within your own family, then in families close to you.

When toxic, sibling rivalries are allowed to fester within families, such emotions disrupt the family unit and in extreme cases can even lead to violence. Such relationships can last a lifetime with no resolution. These rivalries not only affect the family unit, but such discord can even creep into a community.  

Allow this thought to percolate in your mind. When Cain slew Abel, this was not the first time that Cain's anger got the best of him. I submit that this rivalry was an ongoing saga between the two brothers. I imagine that Cain's angry emotions kept building until he exploded in a fit of rage! And why not? Growing up in a household of boys, you have to ask yourself what young boys do? They learn how to fight. They cultivate jealousies and plot out their revenge. This pattern of behavior may follow them into their adult years if not resolved.  

Families are sacred spaces! In this wonderful institution created by God, parents are given the awesome responsibility to teach their children in the ways of righteousness. In this loving setting, children can see what it means to be honorable. Children can learn what it means to be forgiving. In a righteous household, trust is something that is developed and cherished. Honesty is part of the code of conduct.When mistakes are made, children are not harshly treated, but treated with mercy so that they can be merciful. Most of all, children are directed to grow into the persons that God intended them to be.  

In the stories of Cain and Abel and Jacob and Esau, siblings did not grow up valuing the uniqueness from the other. They did not lift each other up and support the individualization of their brothers. In doing so, they could not recognize that they had their own unique gifts and that they were each special in God's eyes. They were not taught that one of their roles was to encourage and lift up their siblings. In essence, to be their brother's keeper. When brothers do this, they won't become competitive or jealous of the other. Stop for a moment and think about healthy families. When you see siblings supporting and encouraging one another, is not conflict greatly reduced?  Does not their love for each other glow like the morning sun?  

In closing, allow me to raise one more troubling thought. If siblings grow up in a household of conflict and jealousy, it is difficult to set aside those memories. There is no denying that you experienced that hurt. If you think about it, your memory may be distorted. For example, have you ever returned, after a long absence, to your grandmother's house as an adult and discovered that her house was not as big as you remembered it?  In fact, now it looks quite small.  Is it possible that our memories hold the same perspective? That which is large when we were young has now grown small as we became adults. Yet, we react as if those hurtful memories are still large. We have the capacity to change our perspective if we are willing to break through our denial of memories that have been distorted. 

Remember, that on that Good Friday when Jesus painfully hung on the cross, He never talked about that experience and memory after His resurrection. His perspective had changed; He didn't look back.  Instead, He pointed us to the future. 










  

Do you believe in miracles, p.t 2 by Lawrence S Perry, B.S., M.Div

Do You Believe in Miracles (pt 2)

Another Miracle

Have you ever heard of the Loretto Chapel in Santa Fe, NM? It is known worldwide for its spiral staircase. How it was constructed, however, remains a mystery. The staircase was built to allow access to the choir loft. The chapel was operated by seven nuns who prayed for a carpenter who could build the staircase and complete the building project. There was one problem, how to build in such a small space.  

On the 9th day of their prayer vigil, a stranger arrived at the church and informed the nuns he was looking for work and could fulfill their request on one condition. He had to work alone, and no one was to be present while he was working.

What this carpenter built still baffles experts to this day. He built a spiral staircase using no nails nor glue. The structure does not have a central support beam, and the wood used was not common to the area. When the project was completed, the sisters wanted to throw a banquet in the carpenter's honor, but he was nowhere to be found.  He had just disappeared, not leaving a trace of who he was or where he was from. The sisters wondered if he was St. Joseph? 

The story of Loretto Chapel has been researched, studied, books have been written and movies made of this mystery and questions still remain.  The story is grounded in both truth and myth. What remains and stands before everyone who visits the chapel is that a unique, beautiful staircase exists that captures one's faith and imagination. What is true of Loretto Chapel, is also true of my experience of the bombing at Cokeville Elementary School.

Breakdown of a Miracle

When all of the students were packed into classroom 4, it was hot and the fumes from the bomb were making the students ill. So, some of the teachers asked if they could move the desks out into the hall. That was done, and as a result, the students could sit on the floor closer to the ground. In addition, the teachers were allowed to open the windows and doors to provide cross-ventilation, thereby blowing out the gas fumes. Furthermore, one of the teachers put a taped perimeter around the bomb so that the children would not get close to it, which kept the kids a number of feet from the device.  These actions were lifesaving! When the bomb was accidently discharged, it didn't blow out but up into the ceiling. Because the children were seated on the floor, many were saved from the blast.  

What cannot be explained, however, was the fact that the bomb was constructed in two parts. The upper part detonated, but the bottom portion did not! With regards to John M., the music teacher who was shot, the perpetrator was carrying two hand guns, a .22 cal. and a .357 cal. When David tried to stop John in the hallway, David pulled out the .22 cal. and shot John.  If he had pulled out the .357, there is no telling if John would be alive today. In addition, the doctor at the emergency room explained that when John was shot in the back, the bullet had an unexplained path. The bullet entered his back heading toward his spine. The bullet, for some unknown reason, went around his spine and lodged in his shoulder blade.

There was also one more intriguing story.  Some of the Mormon children reported that some people dressed in white were in the room.  They said they were angels.  

As one who believes in angels, I cannot dispute this claim. On the other hand, when I spoke to the teachers, none of them could confirm that story. In fact, all summer long I listened to their stories, and no one mentioned angelic beings present in the classroom. What we are left with is, that like the miracle at Loretto Chapel, this story is also grounded in fact and myth. What I do know was that there were lots of prayers being lifted up both within the classroom and outside of the building. The fact remains that not a child, teacher, or staff person was killed. And that was the true miracle!

Do You Believe in Miracles? pt. 1 by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

Do You Believe In Miracles?

How would you answer that question?  If you said no, what is the reason behind your reasoning? Would you say that miracles go against scientific reasoning?  Would you say that you never witnessed a miracle, therefore, they do not exist?  How about you just don't know!  If you said yes, how would you justify your thoughts? Can miracles be proven?  Have you experienced a miracle in your own life?  Or do you accept the notion that miracles must be received on the basis of faith?  You may believe because the foundation of the Christian faith is built upon on the story of the Virgin birth and the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead. So, you believe, but perhaps you still have questions as to whether miracles still happen?  Allow me to share my story, and you can decide.

Background for the Story

In 1984 I was assigned to a small country church in Cokeville, WY. It was one of three mission churches I oversaw in the western part of the state. As one of my duties, I established a chaplaincy program for the Lincoln County Sheriff's Office. The idea being that when a serious problem arose in the field, the chaplain could respond and provide spiritual comfort to victims and families.  Having worked as a deputy sheriff in CA, this new responsibility was a good fit. To my surprise, it didn't take long before my services were called into action.

On a beautiful spring afternoon, I received a call from the Sheriff's Dispatch to respond to Cokeville, which was 45 miles away. I was called to assist in a hostage situation. The day was May 16th, which will forever be etched in my mind. Also, I was instructed to pick up Fr. Sullivan, the Roman Catholic priest, who also had a small congregation in that small community. Apparently, someone was holding the entire elementary school hostage!

On our drive to Cokeville, we drove in silence. All the time, I was thinking that this must be a mistake. No one takes a whole school hostage, not in a small community in Wyoming! Surely, this would all be over by the time we got there and learned that it was a big hoax. Nothing could be further from the truth. Just in case, in our silence, I was offering up my prayers.

When we arrived, I parked just off one of the main streets where we could observe the school. Quickly, I surveilled the scene and witnessed the chaos. This was no hoax. One- to two-hundred parents were yelling and screaming on the road that led to the school. They were headed to the school. Looking at the school, I could see smoking coming from one of the classrooms and a rush of children and adults pouring out of the building. Knowing that in Wyoming everyone who drove a pickup truck had a rifle hanging in the back window. My immediate concern was that they would take things into their own hands. I also knew the Sheriff's office was  busy trying to control what was taking place inside the building. I told Fr. Sullivan that we had to keep this angry and emotional crowd back. We were both wearing our clerics, and thus, we were signs of authority, which helped. Then, the situation grew in greater intensity. From the classroom, two deputies were dragging a woman's body from the classroom window. The way they were dragging her, I knew she was dead. If she were a teacher or suspect, I didn't know. But, all of my experience was telling me the situation was now critical.  

As kids and faculty continued to pour out of the building, many of them ran to me for safety. I directed them to where my truck was parked and where they would be out of harm's way. There were 136 kids in that school at the time. In addition, there were 9 teachers and 6 staff, plus a UPS driver and a young teacher applicant fresh out of college. Of this group, 16 kids and 6-7 of the teachers attended my small mission. Six of my kids had to be rushed to the hospital with burns. I had quickly learned that John, the music teacher and one of the members of my congregation had been shot, and he was also sent to the hospital in Montpelier just across the border in Idaho.  

The woman whose body was pulled out of the classroom was Doris
Young. The other suspect in the bombing was her husband David Young. Both individuals were former residents of Cokeville. In fact, David was a former town marshal but was dismissed after his probation. He shared the same fate as his wife. What was their motive? They were seeking to extort 2-million dollars from the Mormon Church and were using the children and staff as their bait! So, when the threat was over, I learned the details.  

Early in the afternoon, the Youngs entered the school well-armed and rolled in a crude, homemade bomb made of gasoline, gun powder and shrapnel. The bomb had a crude, triggering device which was attached by a string. The device was transported on a grocery cart. Once inside the school, they took over classroom four. They also seized the administration office and had the staff announce that they were coming to an assembly. The entire school population was then crammed into classroom 4, which was the homeroom of one of my parishioners.

Once everyone was under control in the classroom, David Young had to go to the bathroom. He gave his wife the detonation string which made everyone nervous. When she would talk, she waved her hands around until she accidently set off the bomb! Pandemonium followed which allowed students and staff to escape from the building. David Young returned to the classroom and found his wife critically injured, so he shot her. He then retreated to the bathroom where he took his own life. Although a handful of the children were burned by the blast, none of them was critically injured. All of the adults made it out safely except John M., the music teacher who was confronted by David Young in the hallway.  John had been shot in the back but made it out of the building.

Aftermath  

After the bombing, the injured had to be sent to hospitals, children reunited with parents, and a roll call of students and staff was made to make sure everyone was accounted for. So, they tried to gather everyone at a staging area. By this time, my immediate concern was for John M who was on his way to Montpelier Hospital which was about 30-miles away. I didn't know the extent of his injuries, but I needed to be there for him and his wife.   

At the hospital, we found John M resting comfortably. We learned that he had been shot in the back with a .22 caliber handgun. The wound was serious; the bullet had almost entered his spine.  

That Sunday I held services at  St. Bartholomew's in Cokeville, and the small log cabin church was full! Knowing how the tragedy was averted, there were many prayers of thanksgiving!  We came very close to losing everyone who was packed into that 32- by 30-foot classroom. The incident has been called the Miracle at Cokeville. The story made the national news, and Hollywood even took the lead in making a movie about the incident. For those who lived through it, it took many months to heal the memories. But what helped was that those teachers, staff and students knew that they were all in God's hands.

In my next post, I will explain more of how that miracle took place.   

    

"Healing the Soul" (part 3) by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

"Healing the Soul" (part 3)

Introduction

If you were to go the Colorado Olympic Training Center and talk to some of athletes in training and ask the question, "How do you prepare for a competition?" Some would say that it begins by preparing your mind. This preparation requires that you, through the discipline of meditation, concentrate on your given routine and imaging your completing the performance perfectly. The theory is that by training the mind the body will follow. No matter what the sport, ice skating, down hill slalom, diving, or gymnastics, you want to train your muscles to respond automatically to what your brain tells them to do. Such a mental excersise demonstrates the power of the mind to direct your human response. Taking this principle a step further, using the mind to heal the soul is an important concept in the healing of memories while allowing the Spirit of Christ to guide you along the way.

Over the years, I have used the gift of inner healing in helping people overcome emotional trama which has left them with a deep sense of guilt, shame, betrayal, the pain of physical abuse, abandonment, and the list goes on. For example, I have been able to witness a healing of a young man who accidentally killed his neighbor. He needed to find forgiveness. Then, there was the young mother who came to me filled with shame as she finally confronted the reality that she was the victim of incest. There was another woman who sought to heal her soul having been victimized by a rape when she was younger.  Each of these situations was successful as we prayed and allowed the Spirit to transform their memories.

Now, there are some in the Christian community who argue that this gift is not found in the Scriptures and therefore is not valid. I, however, will argue the point and direct them to the fruits of this spiritual exercise. Is it not the role of the Spirit of Christ to address the emotional wounds of his beloved? Doesn't Jesus still heal? 

The Memory

Consequently, to heal a memory you have to be able to return to that memory.  To do this, I remind my subject that their brains are like a DVR and are always recording what we see, feel, smell and touch. And with our minds, we have the unique ability to hit the rewind button and go back in time. When they do this, I usually have them get into a comfortable sitting position and then close their eyes. They are then instructed to go back to the day of the trauma and begin to describe in every detail what they see, touch, hear, or smell. It goes without saying that this can be difficult and emotional. There are times, however, when a subject cannot recall a specific memory. In such cases, there is a composite memory. The composite memory is made up of multiple memories woven into one. All of these memories are of multiple episodes. In any case, it is extremely important for the subject to articulate everything they are experiencing which helps me to gain insight to memory and trauma. As they articulate the event, there are many times when I can see some unique feature that was missed or deemed irrelevant, only to discover that these events are extremely important. After the memory is relived, we begin to discuss their thoughts, feelings, and observations of what they had experienced. This review of the event will at times offer new insights into their trauma.

Then, I will ask them to revisit the memory, only this time, to allow Jesus to become visible. What is interesting is that sometimes they can see him, and on other occasions they might hear His voice or sense His presence. In every case, I have to be careful not to direct the scene. Each person has to be allowed to imagine their own scenario without me interjecting my thoughts, as tempting as it is at times. Consequently, their healing comes from within them, which is critical.  If I were to interject my thoughts and feelings, then their healing can escape them. Their encounter needs to be their personal experience.  Furthermore, I have discovered that when the Spirit enters the memory, what is done, is far different from what I might think in terms of outcome.  For example, I was dealing with a subject who was victimized by incest. As she played back her memory and she saw Jesus enter the room, he walked up to the bed she and the relative were him. I was expecting the Christ to angrily confront the man. That did not happen. Rather, Jesus went over to the bed and put the little girl and the man on His knees and said, "I love you both!"  The little girl was then able to say to the man, whom she loved, "I forgive you."  This act was extremely important, since the relative had passed away a few years after this story. She finally had closure to her nightmare and found peace and resolution.

After we finished with the second memory, we had a debriefing. I then asked her, if that second memory with Jesus was real? She said that it was very real!  As we continued to talk, I could see a transformation in her face, and her face told the rest of the story. There were no more tears and no more tension in her facial expression. She was unburdened. Most importantly, as the Spirit guided her, the Spirit made know the true character of Jesus. She learned that in the ugly memory, that the Christ was there, and she was not alone.  As He made himself known, He expressed His love to her and the relative.  And finally, Jesus bought reconciliation and healing to her soul.

Conclusion

The healing of memories is an important tool for members in the Christian community who have been scarred by emotional trauma. When this is done with a good practitioner, this spiritual exercise can quickly address the wounds that damage the soul. These wounds need to be exposed by prayer, meditation, and discernment. As we use the gift of our minds to look into our past, we invite the Christ to transform those hurtful memories into  positive ones.  As a result, the memory that lives on in the person is a joyful encounter with the Lord of Life.

"Healing the Soul" (Part 2), by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

Healing the Soul  (Part 2)

Introduction

Do you remember the last time you had a major blowout with you spouse or significant other?  It was probably heated, and your emotions got the best of you. After you had a chance to cool down, you resumed the topic in a more conciliatory speech. As you talked out the issue, you could see how there was a misunderstanding and the issue was misconstrued, or perhaps you were just wrong. Whatever the case, you reconciled having resolved the argument, and you were able to move on in your lives. Had you not resolved the argument, the hurt would have continued only to resurface at a later date.  Emotional hurt never resolves itself; it needs to be acknowledged and expelled. When we deal with emotional trauma, we open the doors to healing and peace.

What I have come to acknowledge both in my life and the lives of others that when we have been traumatized, especially when we were children, we are emotionally stuck in time. As a result, we process many of our thoughts, feelings and actions through this first emotional crisis. Having been frozen in time, we are unable to mature emotionally when we have found ourselves in similar circumstances. So, rather than facing an emotionally troubling issue like an adult, we respond like the hurt child. Just think, how many times have you responded in such a way? Have you ever used the phrase, "You're acting like a child!"

Healing that Inner Child

When you come to realize, that you are being affected by childhood memories, how do you begin to address such issues? You start with your belief system. Faith opens your mind and allows you to be guided by the  Holy Spirit. This is why it is so important to understand how the voice of God is speaking in the session. Will you see a vision, hear a voice, feel a presence, or be reminded of a Scripture verse that directly speaks to your issue? Faith takes you there!  

I once was doing a session with a man I will call Thomas. When we went back to the memory that was causing him trauma, we were at the point of envisioning Jesus in the memory.  However, nothing was happening; he could not see, hear, or feel the presence of Christ. Up to this point, I never had that happen in a session and I was greatly puzzled. So, I stopped the session and began to question him further. What I discovered was that he had a "blockage". Even though he was an active member of the church, he did not believe he was worthy to enter the Holy Presence of God. Consequently, he could not allow the presence of Christ to enter his memory. To continue, we had to address the issue before continuing.  Having addressed his faulty theology, we were able to finish the session with healing results. My friend started off as a doubting Thomas and ended up as a believer! 

I had long learned that as you begin a session, you invite the Spirit of God to be your guide. I long ago noted that when Jesus was asked to do a healing, he often asked the person, "Do you want to be healed?" Why did he do this?  I believe it was because when a person is healed they have to take responsibility for the consequences of the healing. They have to change their lives around. There will be no more excuses for their behavior. If they were a beggar, they now had to become a contributing member of the community. Their healing meant that their lives were changed.

When you start a session, you begin with prayer.  It could be a short, simple prayer. A good place to start is by reading and meditating on a short passage of Scripture like Psalm 46. You might have your own passage that brings you comfort. The point is that you want to open your spirit to the Spirit of God. Furthermore, when you seek to do a session, it is important to have a person who either has practiced the art of inner healing or the helper is a mature Christian who has demonstrated that they have the gift of discernment. You also have to remember that sometimes our memories are emotional time bombs that can detonate when we pry them open. You don't want to be left there to pick up the pieces, saying "What do I do now?"

What I suggest is to search a reading list on the subject to become familiar with the spiritual discipline of Inner Healing. There are a number of books and Christian authors out there who have prayerfully written on the subject.

Remember, once you choose to do an inner healing, you have crossed into a spiritual world, and that world contains land mines if you are not careful. For this reason, the spiritual world can be confusing in the hands of a novice even though they may be well-intentioned. So, if you still decided to seek a practitioner, you can easily google, "Healing of Memories", and that search will provide further guidance.      

In my next session, I will deal with the second step to healing using your DVR.

"Healing the Soul" by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

Healing the Soul

Gathering for the Holidays

When I was active in parish ministry, there were times when someone would come into my office in a nervous mess.  After sitting down, they would explain that they would go through this anxiety as the holidays approached.  Their anxiety was rooted in the fact that some family member, a father, mother or sibling, was coming to the family dinner, and their presence would raise all of this emotional baggage!  Every time they would come, there were all these issues that they brought with them. Invariably, some time during the visit, old issues would creep into the conversation, and the family argument was on. If alcohol was involved, the matter often became worse.  

When presented with this problem, I often offered a simple solution. Before the visit with that family member, the host could define the boundaries of the family visit. They could lay down the rules as to what were acceptable topics and what were not. If the affected party could not abide by the rules that were laid down, it was suggested that they may want to reconsider their decision to join the family. It was their choice. There were, however, other occasions when a situation called for more than establishing boundaries.  What was needed was the healing of the soul. 

Healing the soul, or sometimes called healing of memories, was a Christian technique that was used by practitioners who were skilled in addressing painful memories of an individual. I had learned of this practice when I was in seminary and attended a workshop by Francis and Judith MacNutt.  Francis was a former Roman Catholic priest, but who left the order. He, however, continued to lecture and write a number of books that were read throughout the Catholic and Episcopal Churches.  

What is Soul Healing?

Allow me to answer by sharing an example.  One day while sitting in my office, a woman entered in tears. She quickly got to the point and told me that her husband was leaving her.  She was devastated!  I then began to question her as to the issues in her marriage. As we talked, it became clear that the possible divorce was a serious matter, but there was a deeper underlying issue going on in her soul. Abandonment!  So, I continued my query and began raising questions about her previous relationships. It was no surprise that I quickly learned that she had a plethora of relationships where she was left behind.  As hurtful as the possible divorce was at the time, she was devastated by the fact that she was going to be abandoned one more time. My question was, where was this cycle rooted?  When did this fear develop? Like a criminal detective with each question I got closer to the answer.  At that point, I asked her about her relationship with her father. She confided in me that there was always the fear that he was going to leave her. "Tell me more", I retorted.  She then began to share a vivid memory that had plagued her all of her life. In this memory, she was able to recall every detail. She told the story as if she were reliving the event.

When she was quite young, she shared that she was attending school in a small Wyoming town.  Her dad had picked her up from school just as a storm was beginning to hit. And like always, the wind was howling and the snow was spitting. As they reached the out-skirts of the town, the car died. Her dad then told her that he had to walk back to town to get some help and she needed to stay with the car.  As a seven year old, she could not understand why she could not go with her dad. From the back seat as her face was pressed against the back window, she watched her father disappear into the dusk.  With tears in her eyes and with the Bronco swaying back and forth from the fierce wind, she felt abandoned and feared her father would not return.  In addition, the wind was blowing so hard she feared that the Bronco would roll over. After giving me every detail of the event, she opened her eyes as the tears were once again flowing. She relived the event as if it had just happened.

Immediately after revisiting that memory, we sat back and examined the event. Then we stopped and entered a time of prayer, praying that the Spirit of God would enter that memory.  After a time of prayer, I ask her if she would be willing to go back into the memory. This time there was going to be an exception. I asked her if she could image Jesus being there with her.  She agreed to relive the memory.  She was instructed to once again close her eyes, hit the play button, and begin to describe every detail of the memory.

As she shared the event once again, she was immediately comforted by the fact that Jesus was in the vehicle with her. Although He did not speak, he was visible. He had placed His arms around her. Then she mentioned that she was cold. From out of nowhere, it struck me and I asked what she was wearing. "A dress," she replied. I questioned her further about the location of her coat. She said that she did not have one! It was a moment of revelation.  I could see her face was now filled with a sense of peace, and she fell asleep in Jesus' arms as she waited for her father to return.

After that second time of reliving the memory, we once again discussed the event.  From the perspective of a little girl, her father had abandon her. Now, as an adult, she understood the dynamics of the event.  Her father was trying to protect her from the elements. When he left her in the Bronco, it was an act of love. Even more important, she experienced the real presence of the Christ in her life.
Was Jesus really in the memory?  From my perspective, he was guiding us along the way. In the end, the memory of that fearful event was not the original, but a transformed memory of healing. Yes, she ended up in a divorce, but she was no longer harboring feelings of abandonment. Was the healing event real? Did I somehow manipulate the session?  I'll let the facts speak for themselves.

Healing of the soul is not a new phenomenon; I was reminded of this fact in John's Gospel 21:15, the reinstatement of Peter.  As you may recall on that night that Jesus was arrested, Peter, when confronted by a number of individuals, denied that He knew Jesus nor was he one of his followers, not once, nor twice, but three times. So, when Peter sees the resurrected Christ for the first time, Jesus asked, "Peter do you love me?"  The apostle answered in the affirmative. Then, once again, Jesus asked Peter, " Do you love me?" Again Peter affirms his love. If that were not enough, the question is put to Peter a third time! Why was the question asked three times? Jesus, through the power of the Holy Spirit, knew the answer before He even asked. Peter, however, needed to erase from his memory his denial of Jesus and affirm his love to the man whom he stood before--the resurrected Lord of Life.  

In this short presentation, I condensed a two-hour session to just a few paragraphs for the sake of brevity.  In the mean time, allow me to leave you with these questions. How long have you been carrying around your hurts?  Do they still hold you hostage?  Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could heal our hurtful memories and those of our children and grandchildren immediately after experiencing an emotional trauma? We need not be prisoners of our past! In my next episode, I'll share with you the steps of healing the soul.

  

The "If and Then" Clause by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

The "If and Then" Clause

Popular Culture Myths

As our families prepare for Christmas, many parents are telling their children stories about Santa. In their story telling, they will encourage their children to write a letter to Santa Claus telling him that they have been good. And if they have been good, Santa will honor their wish and on Christmas Eve provide the present they desire. Parents will also note that if the children were bad then Santa may not visit their home. Of course, this is a subtle way to control our children. I call this principle the "If and Then" clause. Unfortunately, this teaching  does not end when we are children. The "if and then" clause is found in many aspects of our society that governs many of our thoughts and actions. This principle is found in our law, our economics, even in our theology.

 Just the other day I was watching a TV evangelist speaking on this very principle. He was stating that if a person was good then God would reward them. The evangelist was correct. This principle is found through out the Old Testament. I concur that God has spoken through the Hebrew Scripture, but the story of redemption is only fulfilled in the New Testament. As the TV evangelist continued to teach, I found myself questioning his thesis. Is God like Santa Clause?  Does God give out gifts, only if we are good boys and girls? And if we are bad is there no blessing?

As I pondered these questions, I concluded that the evangelist was teaching from the Old Testament.  We are, however, New Testament Christians and as a result have a greater understand of who and what God teaches us through Jesus Christ. As a result, the "if and then" clause is no longer valid.  Before you question my conclusion, allow me to offer this insight.

 A New Teaching

In New Testament teaching, Jesus calls upon his followers to follow Him and walk in His footsteps.  He encourages us to live a life of righteousness. He teaches us to love as God loves without preset conditions or prejudice. We are to love unconditionally. He encourages us to seek justice. When called for, we are told to be merciful. Joy should govern our thoughts and actions. When we fall short of the mark, we are to seek forgiveness.  In other words, to follow Jesus is to accept Him as the bread of life that feeds our souls, Jn. 6:39. To follow Him is to accept Him as light of the world which directs our lives. And with each step, we put our trust in the great shepherd of the flock who protects us along our journey, Jn.10:11. With such trust, the Christ will lead us to eternal life. This gift of eternal life is a present reality and not a gift that is given in the future. In Christ, we have eternal life now! Jn.11:25. So, the call is to follow the Christ who is "the way, the truth and the life", Jn. 14:6.  Is there any other example of what it looks like to be totally human?

In this journey of faith take note; the gifts that God gives through Jesus Christ are inherent in the life we choose to live. If we choose to live a life of righteousness, we are blessed by our decision.  If we choose to be just, we will always be blessed by our actions. If we choose to live by love, that love will be automatically returned to us, ten, twenty, and even a hundred fold! You see, beloved, if God is of a pure heart, nothing un-pure can co-exist within His nature. Perfect love will always drive out that which does not belong. So, in Jesus Christ, we discover what it means to be fully human. And when we decided to follow and live as He lived, we discover the extent to which we are blessed.  Our blessings are a present reality and not a future hope.  

Establishing a Sacred Space by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

Establishing a Sacred Space

A Quiet Place at Home

When I was growing up, one of the things you would always find in our home was an altar. This was used by both of my parents. The altar was made up of statues of Jesus, Mary, Joseph, St. Michael and St. Anthony. Of course, there was a crucifix and a Three-D picture of Jesus. Although we kids did not use the altar, my parents prayed there every day. What I noted with amazement, was that when my mom was struggling with an issue or question, she would go to her sacred space, pray and come out of the room with a sense of peace. Her quiet time led her to the answer.

A Dedicated Space

I realize that many families do not establish altars at home; this idea is an Hispanic custom. Having a

dedicated space, however, is important to one's spiritual formation. This sacred space is not only a sanctuary to lift up our concerns, it is a place to listen to how our prayers are being answered.  Consequently, a sacred space must be intentional. The space should be established where it is free from household chaos and negative energy. Next, one may want to establish a focal point, a simple cross or other item that reflects your faith. A small votive candle is always a nice touch and symbol. The focal point helps us to focus. Having established a space and focal point, using the space you may want to quiet your mind. Yes, your mind is going to jump around from this thought to that. If you, however, avail yourself of God's Spirit, He will take you in the direction you need to go. Don't be surprised if  you end up in a place or find an answer you would not have chosen for yourself!  If we believe in the power of meditation and prayer, then you need to be open to the answer. Next, be patient! There are times when we meditate and pray that answers are not immediately available.  When the time is right, the answer may just pop into your head, or someone says just the right thing and you have an "aha" moment! Or, you could read a passage in a book or in the Bible and the answer is right there for your eyes to witness. When you have your answer, then at your next quiet session, offer up your thanksgiving.

Finally, allow me to leave you with this final thought. When you are seeking divine inspiration, you must sometimes accept the fact that you may be called upon to be the answer to your own prayers!

Biblical Insight

If you are still intrigued with the subject of revelation and discerning how we hear the voice of God, allow me to direct you to my book, Walking Through the Weeds.  In chapter six I go into greater detail as to the many ways of how God speaks to His beloved people. In scripture, we have over four thousand years of recorded human history. In these biblical stories, mankind was constantly hearing the voice of God. To hear that voice, we must remain astute. Consequently, when a biblical character was sharing how the Lord was speaking to him or her, pay close attention. What you will quickly note is that God continues to speak to you from your dreams--that quiet voice within you. When you're taking that quiet walk along a mountain lake, the voice of God can be seen in the creation He has established. Then, there may be that one person who comes in at just the right time to say just the right thing that you need to hear. Or, on a certain occasion you may receive information from the spiritual and mystical realm of angels. Just as fascinating as angels may be, man has also had the opportunity to see visions of what could be. Most importantly, we are all blessed by the Word of God as recorded in the Bible! The Bible is the story of your redemption and mine. And, as any good story is told, the creator is made known in his creation. 

The Voice of God, continued by Lawrence S. Perry, B. S., M.Div.

THE VOICE OF GOD (Cont.)

WHAT SCRIPTURE REVEALS

In my last blog, I addressed the fact that one of the ways God speaks is through that still, small voice from within. When we, however,  continue our search through the Bible, we uncover a number of stories that tell that God will reach out to us in our dreams. For instance, in MT:2-12f, an angel appears to Joseph in a dream and instructs him to take the Christ child to Egypt for He was in danger.  And Joseph obeys. In the Old Testament, we can read about the exploits of a young man named Joseph, one of the patriarchs of Israel. He is guided by his dreams and had the gift of interpreting dreams. Such a gift helped him save his family and lead the nation of Israel. Gen. 37f. But, what do you say? Do you pay attention to your dreams?  Are dreams still a medium through which the divine reaches out to us?

GIVE ME A SIGN

A number of years ago when I was contemplating a career change, I was in consultation with my par- 

ish priest as to wheather on not to enter seminary.  At the time I was somewhat confused. Wisely, my priest told me to simply look for a sign. That night I was reading a book which was talking about how God speaks to us through dreams. So, I challenged God to give me a dream as a sign of his will. I was somewhat smirking at the time. However, that night I dreamt in living color that I was submitting my application to seminary. The next morning I laughed as I was thinking that I really set myself up for that and quickly set aside my thoughts on the subject. The next night I was surprised to continue the dream where I found myself in seminary. The dream was once again in living color. When I woke up, I said that was odd. I had never had a sequential dream before. We weren't done yet. The third night the dream continued in technicolor, and I found myself leading my first worship service. I thought I had received my answer to the next step in my journey. Since that time, I have paid close attention to my dreams. Do you?  Remember, walking in sacred space is a moment in time, and you'll miss it if you're not open to the movement of the Spirit of God. 

The Voice of God, by Lawrence S. Perry, B.S., M.Div

THE VOICE OF GOD

THE DEBATE

Each fall while living in Douglas, WY, I would drive up to the Laramie range to gather my load of fire wood for the winter. It was my quiet time, and this trip was to be no different.The drive up to Esterbrook, where this little chapel was located, would only take about 40 minutes. When I got into my truck and set off, I immediately knew that this trip was going to be different.  Out of nowhere, I was entering a debate with God. 

                                                                                                    Allow me to put the debate into context.  A week prior, I was down in Cheyenne at a Christian conference. The leader of the conference was raising the question as to whether or not we had dedicated our lives to Christ.  If not, he was going to offer an altar call. This was rather a strange event for an Episcopal Church!  Did I go up? No.  You see, beloved, I'd been baptized, confirmed, sang in the choir, and was on the governing board of our local parish. In other words, I was a member in good standing! So, why did I have to make this new commitment?  The question haunted me all week, and now it was following me all the way up the mountain. I could not shake the voice that was reigniting in my head.

As I got to Esterbrook Chapel, I stopped my truck, slammed the door and yelled out, "What in the hell do you want from me!?"  The voice said, "I want your commitment!"  I finally capitulated as I declared one condition. "Don't put me on a soap box somewhere thumping on a Bible and telling sinners  to repent. All of a sudden, the debate was over as I committed my life to Christ.  It was a moment in time that changed the course of my life.  

From that moment on, my life was slowly being transformed. That which I used to do, no longer had the same appeal. I found myself buried in inspirational books and reading the Bible for the first time.
The funny thing was, I hated to read for pleasure--dyslexia does that!

My Spiritual Awakening to Holy Presence by Lawrence S. Perry

My Spiritual Awakening to Holy Presence 

My Eyes were Opened

We had just moved back to San Francisco in late summer and before school started when my father decided to enroll my brother and me into St. Joseph's Catholic School. Prior to this time, I don't remember attending Sunday services or having any religious training. We were, however, baptized Catholic, and this was the church where our family had its roots. The school was part of a large complex, and St. Joseph's Church was the anchor. For a little guy in fourth grade, the building seemed massive.  

Entering a parochial school was a new experience. The school was run by an order of nuns who operated the school with strict discipline and a ruler when you acted out. Of course, we had to wear a uniform consisting of a white shirt, blue sweater, and gray corduroy pants. I don't remember much about the school, but entering the church was a different matter.

The church building was impressive! Built in the Romanesque style, the church stood out. Not only was the outside impressive, the sanctuary added to its charm. The memories of entering the church are still fresh in my mind. As I walked down the main aisle, I could hear the echo of my foot steps bounce off the walls. Off in the corner, I could hear the whisper of voices as someone was offering their confession of sin and ridding themselves of guilt and shame. Continuing to walk, I could see a stranger kneeling at a pew and quietly reciting the rosary. Something was going on here, something new and mystical. Looking up, I found myself surrounded by a cacophony of brilliant light as each piece of stained glass caught the morning sun. Moving closer to the high altar, where Sunday Mass was offered, both sides of the altar had red votive candles strategically placed. And for ten cents, you could light a candle in remembrance of the prayer you just offered. High above the altar hung a gold cross to remind you why you were there.  As I stood in that space for the first time, I somehow knew that this was a sacred space.  In the midst of that, the silence spoke volumes. Standing in awe, I knew that this place was holy! No one had tell me; I was experiencing the moment.

Sadly, the church has since been deconsecrated having been badly damaged by an earthquake. It was left in ruins until it was remodeled as an art center. Does this mean it is no longer sacred?

What I have learned since is that sacredness is not necessarily based on a place. What makes something sacred is the moment--a mystical time when you encounter the presence of God. 

Walking as a Spirtual Discipline, blog by Lawrence S. Perry

Walking as a Spiritual Discipline

Nov.2019

In this blog, I would like to invite you to take a journey with me.  No, not a physical journey to some far off land. This journey will require you to use your imagination and enter into your soul and explore some of your deepest thoughts. Yes, it is a spiritual journey, one that will help examine your life and look at where you have been and where God's Spirit is leading you. At times, this will not be an easy journey, because it may require that you have to look at some difficult times in your life.  But, trust me, the time you invest will be well worth the effort as you come to understand that the path upon which you found yourself will be a path you would not have chosen for yourself.  However, you will rejoice and celebrate as you find new meaning in your life.

 Why Walking?  

I suspect that when you got out of bed, you did not give the steps you took much thought. If you were not afflicted with a physical deformity, walking is something which we do not think much about.  Each step is an automatic sequence in response to your brain waves. We think about a direction we want to go, and Zap! we are on our way. What if the act of walking is more that just a mechanical exercise? What if the act of walking takes us down a path that opens some of the deepest secrets of our lives? What if walking opens up Godly revelations that lead to new visions or addresses old concerns? Would this idea change what we think, act and feel about the world in which we live and how we live out our lives? With these thoughts in mind, we will quickly conclude that walking is a spiritual discipline that may be worth exploring.

What is spiritual about "walking"?

A number of years ago, I had the opportunity to supervise a Christian Jr. high church camp.  It was always a week of high energy! To help release some of that youthful energy, I always scheduled one day to hike up Laramie Peak just west of Douglas, WY.  The mountain ascended 10,000 into the heavens, and it took hours traversing the switchbacks to reach the top. Once reaching the top, I had the kids sit down to eat their lunches and then took the time to open the minds of these impressionable children. My attempt was to raise questions as to what spiritual lessons they had learned on the long trek up the mountain. We talked about how difficult the climb was, what we encountered along the way, how the terrain changed along the way, and whether or not this long difficult journey was worth it. This discussion was taking place as we gazed out over the horizon.  You see, from the peak you could look to the east and your eyes could see the western plans of Nebraska. If you looked to the south,  you could gaze in awe at the peaks of the Rocky Mountains.  From our vantage point, I reminded the kids that a few hours earlier when we started our trek in the valley below, our vision was obstructed by mountain and trees encountered along the way. But now, we could lay claim to the magnificent glory of God and his creation. Our vision was unobstructed, and we could see to the far reaches of the horizon! Only then could I teach them how we can look at life from different perspectives and how we encounter God along the way.


What I had hoped for was that the kids could learn what it meant to walk in a sacred space. And while in that space, to stop and listen to the voice of God as He was whispering in their ears.

Now, I wish I could say that these thoughts were my original pronouncements, however, I cannot take credit.  The reality is that my wisdom was gleaned through the Old and New Testaments. You see, the Bible has a lot to teach us about what it means to "walk".


Walking is not just the physical means to get from here to there. Walking, as used in the Scriptures, will offer a profound definition which point us to a spiritual journey. If you have any doubts, just look at the many ways in which the Bible uses the term. For example: In the Old Testament the people of Israel are always called upon to "walk" in the ways of the Lord. (1st Kings 2:1-4) In Isaiah 33:15f the prophet encourages his followers to "walk in righteousness", and they would find refuge in God. In John's gospel, the apostle records Jesus as saying that He, Jesus, is the way, the truth and the life, whoever believes in him shall have eternal life. (Jn. 14:6)  In other words, those who walk in the footsteps of the Christ will find true life! Furthermore, John reminds us that when we walk, we walk in love. (2 Jn. 6) Walking with God opens our minds and souls as to what it means to love.

Consequently, we cannot deny the importance of walking as a spiritual disciple. So I ask you, when was the last time you took a walk? And when was the last time you stopped to hear the whisper of God's voice in your soul? You're now invited to join me in walking into sacred places!